Facing Your Fears
by TrinineWriter
Summary: So far just a one-shot of Natasha and Pepper talking about fear. Might become more? Let me know if you want more ;)


Pepper stretched her neck from side to side and leaned back in her office chair. She looked over her desk to where Natasha sat working on her own stack of paperwork.

"How do you deal with it," Pepper wondered aloud. She was truly curious how her girlfriend always seemed to be put-together.

"Deal with what?" Natasha asked continuing to sift through piles of papers.

"The stress, the stuff you go through.. the stuff you see... I mean... Most people end up with PTSD."

Natasha drew in a deep breath, "Most people are not trained their entire lives either."

Pepper raised her brow in silent agreement. "But still, I really don't know how you do it."

"Pepper-" Natasha started realizing the topic wasn't going to be easily dropped.

"I mean, sometimes, it's like, like you're not even afraid," Pepper said her mind now reeling.

Natasha ran her hand through her hair and started to laugh. The laughter took Pepper by suprise and instantly pulled her back to the situation. "What's so funny?"

Natasha smiled and shook her head. Silently, she stood from her chair, and circled around Peppers desk. Pepper turned her chair so she was facing her girlfiend and before she knew it, Natasha had dropped to her knees.

"What are you doing," Pepper asked now really confused.

"Pepper," Natasha cleared her throat and rested her hands on the tops of Pepper's thighs.

Pepper arched an eyebrow wondering if her girlfriend was thinking of having some fun, but then she caught a glimpse of Natasha's dark eyes and she knew that wasn't the case.

Natasha took a deep breath and blew it out from between her lips. She had not expected that they would be having this talk so early in their relationship. But better now than never she supposed and took another deep breath.

"It's not that I'm not afraid," Natasha started. Her voice was quiet and Pepper leaned forward just a bit.

"I get scared sometimes," Natasha continued. Her voice trailed off as her eyes followed the stitching of Pepper's dress. She took in another deep breath, focusing on letting her shoulders relax.

"I just, I know how to handle my fear, how to harness it... I can control it. I was trained to..."

Natasha let out a heavy sigh, and let her forehead rest in Pepper's lap. Her mind was filled with visions and her voice trembled with their horror. "The things I see Pepper..." She swallowed hard. "The things I hear, they come back to me sometimes."

Her hands started to shake, but she balled them into fists. "But I, I don't allow myself to dwell on them. I keep pushing forward, moving toward the next target." Natasha blew out a heavy breath and took a moment to once again compose herself.

"Tasha," Pepper's melodic voice washed over Natasha as she stroked her fingers through her hair.

Natasha looked up at Pepper and was suprised to see tears in her eyes.

"I'm sorry," Pepper apologized and Natasha instantly placed a finger over Pepper's lips.

"Don't apologize for this. We've needed this... I've needed this.. for longer than I'd care to admit."

Pepper nodded her head and Natasha removed her finger from Pepper's lips.

Pepper took Natasha's hands in her own and placed a tender kiss to each one. The gesture made both women smile and Natalie leaned back so she was sitting on her heels.

"Pepper, there's something that I've been wanting to tell you but..." Natasha felt herself fumbling for the right words as she studied their joined hands. "I'm not good at showing my emotions. And I know that can make it difficult to connect with me. But I want you to know," Natasha looked up and met Pepper's shinning eyes, "This is the most intense and amazing relationship that I have ever been in."

"Pepper you are more important to me than anyone in my life." She squeezed Pepper's hands tightly. "And while I don't know how to love very well, I do know that I love you." The words brought an unstoppable smile to Natasha's face. Conviction filled her heart and pure happiness filled her veins.

"I love you Pepper Potts. I love you with every fiber of my being. Even the darkest parts of my soul love you."

Tears started to stream down Natasha's face but she didn't care. And for the first time, in what seemed like a lifetime, she didn't try to stop them.

"So the only thing in this life that truly scares me is losing you," Natasha confessed.

"Oh my gosh Tash," Pepper's words were a blur as she leaned forward and slipped out of her chair. She fell to her knees colliding with her girlfiend. Pepper circled her arms around Natasha's slim waist and pulled her in for an almost - crushing embrace.

Natasha couldn't stop smiling, nor could she stop the tears of relief that now covered her cheeks.

"I love you too," Pepper whispered as Natasha's arms wrapped around her waist.

They held their embrace for a while, both content to enjoy their new found love and appreciation for one another.

The End ?


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